Dealing With Difficult Teenage Sons
These days parents complain a lot about understanding their teenage sons. This article provides you with ways of dealing with difficult teenage sons.
Parenthood is obviously difficult. You have to do a lot of effort to keep your children emotionally and physically happy.
However, this struggle intensifies with age. A number of parents often complain that with the growing age, their children are unable to listen to their advice because they prefer their lives with their own rules.
This kind of behavior then sets problems for parents as well as the children where a secret yet strange kind of boundary starts existing between both of them.
KEY POINTS
- Teenage sons are often difficult to handle by their parents because of their increasingly aggressive behavior.
- Parents need to develop a sense of understanding with them in order to help them in this journey.
- A fine conversation and predetermined boundaries enable sons not to do anything that is out of the limits.
- Excessive strictness is not a solution but it makes the growing guys rebellious.
- Once you ensure your sons that you understand them and will help them if they need any guidance, they acknowledge your presence during this phase.
Why Does Age Become A Boundary?
It is an obvious thing that as someone grows in life, things change and the personality shapes into a new individuality.
Nearly all species, especially humans, have this ability to change at a quick pace. You cannot expect a human to remain under the impression of one personality the whole life.
This is why it gets problematic for parents when their children are on their way to adulting. For parents, children are still those immature kids which they had once seen and for children, they are no longer young kids in their opinion who need to be guarded and instructed.
This creates a clash between the two mentalities. This clash isn’t the clash of ages but the clash of generations where the previous generation believes in abiding traditions and norms, then there is the newer generation which seems to grow tired of it and want to do something of their own which is unconventional and defies tradition.
Why Is It Difficult To Deal With Teenage Sons?
At the edge of adulting, being a teenager is the most dangerous time in an individual’s life. This is the time when a person is experiencing a number of things at the same time.
There are biological issues, issues with peers, and academics during this time period. Girls are quite adjusting to the guidance which is granted to them by their parents but guys don’t have any such stamina to tolerate a number of things occurring altogether.
Parents find it very hard to deal with their teenage sons because they believe that teenagers change them totally leaving aggression and stubbornness in them. At that time, it becomes a headache for parents to monitor all activities of their sons along with providing them with guidance.
The differences existing between parents and their teenage sons often become so strong that they don’t even resolve at a later age.
Thus, a number of parents seek ways to guide and help their sons through their teenage journey compared to the past because now everything has changed its shape so parents have to understand a number of things.
7 Ways Of Dealing With Difficult Teenage Sons
No matter how difficult it is to deal with teenage sons, one thing must always be kept in mind. “You can never control a grown-up person but you need to understand”. With this, there are several other helpful ways that can help you understand the psychology of teenage sons in a better way.
- Talk About It
- Determine The Correct Path And Boundaries
- Be Friendly
- Concentrate On Their Behaviour
- Provide Them Some Useful Hobbies
- Spend Time Together On Weekends
- Give Them The Freedom To Choose Their Path
Talk About It
A fine conversation can solve a number of issues. You cannot not only find the true solution but can also understand the point of view of your child. As puberty begins, the biological changes are the first ones to alter the emotions as well.
Unfortunately, a number of people don’t talk to their sons just because they consider it a taboo subject to be discussed. Remember! Your timely conversation and suggestion about handling puberty truly can help you a lot in giving them the idea that it is not something that is unique and is normal in every individual’s life.
Researches have proved that where this kind of conversation at the onset of puberty is not deemed significant, those teenagers are most likely to find about the changes through their peers and are the ones who get derailed from morality because of peer influence.
Determine The Right Path & Set Boundaries
As parents, it is your moral and social duty to educate your child about right and wrong throughout life. Many parents don’t find the need to tell their children about the right actions because of their busy schedules.
They never pay heed to the direction in which their son is heading. For them, the provision of luxuries is everything. This results in utmost disaster at the end because a teenager who is newly discovering sexuality and emotions often crosses the limits and puts the reputation of his own self and his family in grave danger.
It is therefore important to tell your sons about the limits of their actions and the results of them as well.
Be Friendly
More often we see parents who are more nervous about puberty and changes in their children than the children. This makes them extraordinarily strict about everything.
They expect a lot from their adolescent son and hope that he will never cross the boundaries because of their implied strictness. This is no way to deal with a grown-up guy. You are no longer seeing a child before you who will abide by you for the fear of humiliation.
Grown-up sons are no longer afraid of their parents, so when you try to become excessively strict, they become rebellious. Hence, try to become friendly with them. Understand their goals, their issues, and their thoughts in a friendly way so that they feel free to discuss all their queries with you without hesitation.
Concentrate On Their Behaviour
Teenage guys are often aggressive because they simply want attention from their peer groups or parents.
As parents, you have a duty to understand their body language. Tend to them and try to find out the reason for their aggression. If something strange seems in their usual behavior, never take it lightly because it can be a signal of an unexpected incident.
Find out from them by talking about the issue of their worry. It is normal that young boys get perplexed due to the fast pubertal changes but try to be there whenever they need your assistance.
Provide Useful Hobbies
Obviously, puberty is a roller coaster of emotions and your sons have absolutely no fault in that. Help your sons by providing them some useful hobbies so that they don’t divert their attention towards something that is deemed unsuitable for their age.
You can focus on their talents and introduce to them new activities that they would like. For example, if your son is efficient in soccer, get him enrolled in a soccer academy.
When a young guy finds a hobby that pleases him, the chance of getting involved in other activities gets minimal. This way the talent of your child will be secured along with the essential nourishment.
Spend Time Together On Weekends
Today, the routine has become so busy that even parents find it hard to be with their children due to professional engagements.
This attitude could be dangerous if your son is in the adult phase. He obviously needs you. Your presence could help him a lot in understanding all the changes and eliminating the emotional hype as well.
Try to be with him, if not every day then on weekend at least. Spend family time together. Ask about his routine, school life, friends, and academics. This way you will remain close to your child and will give him a sense of security and warmth which he needs a lot at this stage.
Give Them The Necessary Freedom
As I have already mentioned, once you have talked with your son, don’t stay on the guard all the time. Now that you are done setting up the limits, set him free, so that he can face the difficulties of the world without your help and aid.
Once you will allow him to face the practical world on his own, his own self-confidence will boost up and he will be able to understand this world in a better sense. It will also strengthen your relationship with him because he will feel that you trust him enough to leave him on his own to make his own decisions without your influence.
A number of youngsters have this issue today as they believe that parents must allow them to make some decisions of their lives on their own. So, this will help them a lot in feeling a sense of responsibility towards you as you have trusted them enough to control their lives and they will also become keen enough to not to do anything which disappoints you.
Conclusion
These ways of dealing with difficult teenage sons show that it is not very difficult to understand your sons when they are experiencing a lot because of puberty.
All you need to show them is your own care, sense of understanding, mutual love, and support which will help them heal. It will also enable them to make the right decisions since they don’t want to disappoint the parents who adore and support their children wholeheartedly.
